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Cooperation is Best

Cooperation between divorcing spouses can make the process of divorce easier for a number of reasons.

Firstly, when both parties are willing to cooperate, they are more likely to be able to reach agreements on issues such as property division, child custody, and support. This can reduce the need for expensive and time-consuming court battles, and help the divorce process move more smoothly.

Secondly, cooperation can help to reduce the emotional stress and conflict that often accompanies divorce. When both parties are able to communicate effectively and work together to find solutions, they are less likely to become embroiled in bitter arguments or engage in destructive behaviors.

Thirdly, cooperation can help to preserve important relationships and minimize the impact of the divorce on children. By working together to create a parenting plan that takes into account the needs and wishes of both parents, children can feel more secure and less caught in the middle of their parents’ conflicts.

Overall, while divorce is never an easy process, cooperation between divorcing spouses can help to make it less stressful, less costly, and less damaging to important relationships.

Sometimes it is best to fight

There are several reasons why a divorcing party may want to vigorously fight instead of cooperating with their spouse:

Financial Interests: One of the main reasons why a divorcing party may want to fight is because of financial interests. If they believe that their spouse is hiding assets, undervaluing assets or trying to get an unfair share of the marital property, they may feel compelled to fight to protect their financial interests.

Emotional Attachment: Divorce can be an emotionally charged process, and some individuals may find it difficult to let go of their emotional attachment to their spouse. They may feel a sense of betrayal, hurt or anger, and want to fight to get back at their spouse or prove their point.

Child Custody and Visitation: Another reason why a divorcing party may want to fight is because of child custody and visitation issues. They may believe that their spouse is not fit to have custody of the children, or that their children would be better off living with them. In these cases, they may feel that they have to fight to protect their children’s best interests.

Spousal Support: Finally, spousal support can also be a contentious issue in a divorce. If one spouse believes that they are entitled to receive spousal support and the other spouse disagrees, they may feel that they must fight to protect their right to support.

It’s important to note that while fighting may seem like the best way to get what one wants during a divorce, it can also make the process longer, more expensive, and more emotionally draining for both parties. In many cases, it’s better to work collaboratively with the other party and find a mutually agreeable solution.

Which fights are bad?

  1. Emotional Attachment: Divorce can be an emotionally charged experience, and sometimes one party may feel particularly attached to certain assets, such as a family home, and may want to fight to keep them.
  2. Spite: In some cases, one party may want to fight vigorously out of spite, to hurt the other party or make the divorce process as difficult as possible.
  3. Control: Finally, a divorcing party may want to fight for control. If one party feels like they have been controlled or manipulated during the marriage, they may be more likely to fight vigorously in the divorce process to assert their own control.

Divorce or separation?

Divorce and separation are two different legal concepts that relate to the end of a marriage, but they differ in important ways.

Divorce refers to the legal process of formally ending a marriage. When a couple gets a divorce, they are granted a legal dissolution of their marriage by a court. This involves dividing assets and debts, determining child custody and support, and establishing spousal support if applicable. Once a divorce is finalized, the marriage is legally terminated, and the parties are free to remarry if they choose to do so.

Separation, on the other hand, refers to the decision of a married couple to live apart from each other without formally ending their marriage. In a separation, the couple remains legally married, but they live apart and often divide their assets and debts, determine child custody and support, and establish spousal support. However, because they are still legally married, they cannot remarry.

In some cases, a couple may choose to separate as a trial separation, in order to decide whether they want to reconcile or move forward with a divorce. In other cases, a separation may be a permanent arrangement, either because the couple prefers it or because they are not yet eligible for divorce under local laws.

It’s important to note that the specific laws governing divorce and separation vary by jurisdiction, and can have significant implications for property rights, child custody and support, and other legal issues. Therefore, it’s important to consult with an attorney or legal expert if you are considering divorce or separation.

Divorce or Annulment

Divorce and annulment are two different legal processes that relate to the end of a marriage, but they differ in important ways.

Divorce refers to the legal process of formally ending a valid marriage. When a couple gets a divorce, they are granted a legal dissolution of their marriage by a court. This involves dividing assets and debts, determining child custody and support, and establishing spousal support if applicable. Once a divorce is finalized, the marriage is legally terminated, and the parties are free to remarry if they choose to do so.

Annulment, on the other hand, is a legal process that declares a marriage null and void, as if it never existed. An annulment may be granted if the marriage was invalid from the start, such as if one of the parties was already married, or if the marriage was based on fraud, coercion, or other factors that render it void. In some jurisdictions, an annulment may also be granted if the parties did not consummate the marriage, or if one party was mentally incompetent at the time of the marriage.

One important difference between divorce and annulment is that while divorce recognizes that a valid marriage existed and terminates that marriage, an annulment declares that the marriage was never valid in the first place. This can have important implications for property rights, child custody and support, and other legal issues.

It’s important to note that the specific laws governing divorce and annulment vary by jurisdiction, and can have significant implications for property rights, child custody and support, and other legal issues. Therefore, it’s important to consult with an attorney or legal expert if you are considering divorce or annulment.

What is a trial separation?

A trial separation is an arrangement in which a married couple decides to live apart from each other for a period of time without officially ending their marriage. The purpose of a trial separation is to allow both parties to take time to evaluate their relationship, to work through problems, and to decide whether they want to reconcile or move forward with a divorce.

During a trial separation, the couple typically agrees to live apart for a specified period of time, which can range from a few weeks to several months. They may also agree on certain ground rules, such as whether they will date other people during the separation or how they will handle finances and child custody arrangements.

A trial separation can provide both parties with some much-needed time and space to reflect on their relationship and work on any issues that may be causing problems. However, it’s important to note that a trial separation is not a guarantee that the relationship will be saved or that the couple will reconcile. In some cases, a trial separation may actually lead to a divorce if the parties realize that they are no longer compatible or able to work through their issues.

If you are considering a trial separation, it’s important to communicate openly and honestly with your partner, and to set clear expectations and ground rules. It may also be helpful to seek the guidance of a therapist or counselor to work through any issues and ensure that you are taking the steps necessary to make the most of your time apart.

Do I have a common-law marriage?

California does not recognize common law marriage as a legal way to establish a marital relationship. In other words, even if a couple has lived together for a certain period of time, they are not considered married under California law unless they have obtained a valid marriage license and gone through the formal process of getting married.

However, California does recognize a concept called “putative marriage,” which applies in certain circumstances where a couple may have believed that they were married, but the marriage is later found to be invalid. In these cases, if one party can demonstrate that they entered into the relationship in good faith and believed that they were married, they may be entitled to certain legal rights and protections that are similar to those afforded to married couples.

For example, if a couple believed that they were married and one party is later found to have been legally married to someone else at the time of the relationship, the putative spouse may be entitled to spousal support, property rights, and other legal benefits that would have been available in a legal marriage.

It’s important to note that the rules regarding putative marriage in California can be complex, and it’s important to consult with an attorney or legal expert if you believe that you may be entitled to putative spouse rights.

What is Palimony?

Palimony is a type of financial support that can be awarded to a former cohabiting partner in California. It is similar to alimony, which is awarded to former spouses in divorce cases, but applies to unmarried partners who have lived together and shared financial responsibilities.

In California, palimony is only available in limited circumstances. Specifically, it is only available when a couple has entered into a written or oral agreement in which one party has promised to provide financial support to the other party in the event of a separation or breakup. This agreement can be made before or during the cohabitation, and can take many forms, such as a written contract, a verbal promise, or even a pattern of conduct.

To obtain palimony in California, the recipient must be able to demonstrate that:

There was an agreement between the parties to provide financial support;

The recipient relied on the agreement to their detriment; and

The agreement is enforceable under California law.

In order to enforce a palimony agreement, the recipient must file a lawsuit in court and prove that the agreement is valid and enforceable. This can be a complex and difficult process, as the recipient must be able to provide evidence of the agreement and demonstrate that they relied on it to their detriment.

It’s important to note that while palimony is available in California, it is only available in limited circumstances and is not a guarantee. Therefore, it’s important for unmarried cohabiting partners to consult with an attorney or legal expert to understand their rights and responsibilities under California law.

Do I have a common law marriage from another state?

The following jurisdictions recognize common law marriages:

  1. Alabama
  2. Colorado
  3. District of Columbia
  4. Florida (if created before January 1, 1968)
  5. Georgia (if created before January 1, 1997)
  6. Idaho (if created before January 1, 1996)
  7. Iowa
  8. Kansas
  9. Montana
  10. New Hampshire (for inheritance purposes only)
  11. Ohio (if created before October 10, 1991)
  12. Oklahoma (if created before November 1, 1998)
  13. Pennsylvania (if created before January 1, 2005)
  14. Rhode Island
  15. South Carolina (if created before 7/24/2019)
  16. Texas
  17. Utah

It’s important to note that the specific requirements and rules for creating a common law marriage can vary by state, and couples should consult with an attorney or legal expert to understand their rights and responsibilities under their state’s laws.

What do I need to qualify for an annulment?

In California, an annulment is a legal process that declares a marriage null and void, as if it never existed. To qualify for an annulment in California, you must meet one of the following grounds:

Incest: If you and your spouse are closely related by blood or adoption, you may qualify for an annulment.

Bigamy: If one party was still married to someone else at the time of the marriage, the subsequent marriage is considered void and may be eligible for annulment.

Age: If one party was under the age of 18 at the time of the marriage and did not have the consent of their parents or legal guardians, the marriage may be voidable and eligible for annulment.

Lack of capacity: If one or both parties lacked the mental capacity to consent to the marriage due to mental illness, intoxication, or other factors, the marriage may be voidable and eligible for annulment.

Fraud or misrepresentation: If one party deceived the other party in order to induce them to marry, such as by lying about their identity or concealing a prior marriage, the marriage may be voidable and eligible for annulment.

Inability to Consummate: If one party is physically unable to have sex and it can’t be fixed. This does not mean inability to have children. You must file a request within four years of the marriage.

Unexpected Spouse: If when when one of the parties married, he or she was still married to someone that was either (1) absent for at least five years and not known to be alive, or (2) generally thought to be dead, you can ask for an annulment if the first spouse turns out to be alive.

Force: If one party was forced into the marriage, it can be annulled. You must file a request within four years of the marriage.

It’s important to note that in California, there is no specific waiting period to file for an annulment. Still, you must act within a reasonable amount of time after discovering the grounds for annulment. Additionally, if the parties have children or shared property, those issues will still need to be resolved through legal proceedings, even if the marriage is annulled.

If you believe that you may be eligible for an annulment in California, it’s important to consult with an attorney or legal expert to understand your rights and options.

Legal Terms

“Community estate” includes both community property and quasi-community property.

“Community property” is property that is jointly owned by both spouses.

California Family Code section 760 states that “Except as otherwise provided by statute, all property, real or personal, wherever situated, acquired by a married person during the marriage while domiciled in this state is community property.”

This means that in California, when a married person acquires property (real estate, money, personal possessions, etc.) during the marriage, that property is generally considered community property, which means it is owned equally by both spouses, regardless of who earned or purchased it.

There are some exceptions to this rule, such as property acquired before the marriage or through inheritance or gift, which may be considered separate property. However, absent an applicable exception, property acquired during the marriage is presumed to be community property under California law.

“Date of separation” means the date that a complete and final break in the marital relationship has occurred, as evidenced by both of the following:
(1) The spouse has expressed to the other spouse the intent to end the marriage.(2) The conduct of the spouse is consistent with the intent to end the marriage.

In determining the date of separation, the court shall take into consideration all relevant evidence.

“Employee benefit plan” includes public and private retirement, pension, annuity, savings, profit sharing, stock bonus, stock option, thrift, vacation pay, and similar plans of deferred or fringe benefit compensation, whether of the defined contribution or defined benefit type whether or not such plan is qualified under the Employee Retirement Income Security Act of 1974.

“Family support” means an agreement between the parents, or an order or judgment, that combines child support and spousal support without designating the amount to be paid for child support and the amount to be paid for spousal support.

“Quasi-community property” means all real or personal property, wherever situated, acquired before or after the operative date of this code in any of the following ways:
(a) By either spouse while domiciled elsewhere which would have been community property if the spouse who acquired the property had been domiciled in this state at the time of its acquisition.
(b) In exchange for real or personal property, wherever situated, which would have been community property if the spouse who acquired the property so exchanged had been domiciled in this state at the time of its acquisition.

“Petitioner” xxx

“Respondent” xxx

“Separate property” is property owned by only one of the spouses.

“Support order” means a judgment or order of support in favor of an obligee, whether temporary or final, or subject to modification, termination, or remission, regardless of the kind of action or proceeding in which it is entered. For the purposes of Section 685.020 of the Code of Civil Procedure, only the initial support order, whether temporary or final, whether or not the order is contained in a judgment, shall be considered an installment judgment. No support order or other order or notice issued, which sets forth the amount of support owed for prior periods of time or establishes a periodic payment to liquidate the support owed for prior periods, shall be considered a money judgment for purposes of subdivision (b) of Section 685.020 of the Code of Civil Procedure.